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Black no sugar View Drop Down
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Posts: 3941 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Black no sugar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: moving house need advice
    Posted: 09 May 05 at 2:32am

Only goes to show that one of the lines in Best Funny Emails is true:

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth... deal with it!
Lancing SC
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ed490 View Drop Down
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Joined: 17 Jan 05
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Posts: 34 		Post Options Post Options   Quote ed490 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 3:10pm

And the retaliation:

Why ARE Men Happier ? Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves.  Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress-  $5000. Tux rental- $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood - all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier! Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy reading it.
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hydrographer20 View Drop Down
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Posts: 867 		Post Options Post Options   Quote hydrographer20 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 2:25pm
Originally posted by Black no sugar

(cos if it is, I'm well out of it! I'm female, blonde, French and a nerd! Far too much baggage!)

 

being a woman isnt all that bad bns

Why it's better to be a Woman!

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.
byte me!- GBR 814
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Black no sugar View Drop Down
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Posts: 3941 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Black no sugar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 9:53am

AAAHHH Scottish Tablet, mmmmmmmmmmm!!

I agree with BWD, it deserves a separate thread. It all began because Contender443 is Scottish...

It's that sort of brittle fudge you find in Scotland. You have to LOVE sweet stuff to like it, and hold a superb disregard to your dental health. It's not neat sugar - it's worse...

If anyone's interested, I can share my recipe. Come down to LSC on Sundays to sample the end product (but come early, it doesn't last long).

YUMMY

 
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hydrographer20 View Drop Down
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Posts: 867 		Post Options Post Options   Quote hydrographer20 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 9:38am
what on earth is tablet  why does it remind me of wax ?? bns if u have no body to look after the kids why dobnt you try to pull a favour form bwd?
byte me!- GBR 814
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Black no sugar View Drop Down
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Posts: 3941 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Black no sugar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 8:37am

Yeee haa!  Thnx BWD!

Pity you won't be there tomorrow - There will be more tablet!

 
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bigwavedave View Drop Down
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Posts: 944 		Post Options Post Options   Quote bigwavedave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 7:03am

Originally posted by Black no sugar

At the end of the day, it's a sailing forum, not a meeting place for social discrimination (cos if it is, I'm well out of it! I'm female, blonde, French and a nerd! Far too much baggage!)

You are too harsh on yourself BNS. You are not a nerd.  We all think you're great, (especially when you make tablet). Now that could be another thread to equal Jaffa cakes! 

We will not be at the club this weekend so see you next week.
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Black no sugar View Drop Down
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Posts: 3941 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Black no sugar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 12:17am

Ohhh that would be SO nice!
But I already know the answer: "No bl y way!" 

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Mike278 View Drop Down
Far too distracted from work
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Posts: 256 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Mike278 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 12:09am
Get contender443 to look after the kids
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
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Black no sugar View Drop Down
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Posts: 3941 		Post Options Post Options   Quote Black no sugar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 May 05 at 12:07am

Originally posted by hydrographer20

think the forum is a place to discuss sailing issues - no matter how loosely  

I definitely fit in the "loosely" category

Can't even go sailing this weekend: no babysitter

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