best funny emails

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic rubbish bags, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and once in a while a £20 note flies out of it onto the pavement.
 
Noticing this, a policeman stops her.
 
"Madam, there are £20 notes falling out of that bag..."

"Damn!" says the little old lady....."I'd better go back and see if I can find some of them. Thanks for the warning!"

yes they do otherwise we'd have to intercept every blinkin radar return we saw, which given the volume of air traffic would get expensive and rather tedious!!

whats more the civvy controllers would never work out which ac was which or at what height it was were in not for their mode 3A & C codes which are based on WWII mil IFF systems.

For more information join up we are a bit short of fighter controllers

   Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
   Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will never be
   able to support you. Why do men pass gas more than women? Because
   women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure. One golfer tells
   another: "Hey, guess what? I got a set of golf clubs for my wife!" The
   other replies: "GREAT trade!" How many men does it take to open a
   beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in. What do
   you call a woman with two brain cells? Pregnant. I married Miss Right.
   I just didn't know her first name was Always. Losing a wife can be
   hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. I haven't spoken to my
   wife for 18 months-I don't like to interrupt her. Women are so
   unreasonable! My wife gets mad because every Saturday night I take a
   bath with bubbles in it. I mean, if Bubbles doesn't mind, why should
   she? Most accidents happen at home. And the men have to eat them! Some
   mornings I wake up grouchy...and some mornings I just let her sleep!
   Bigamy is having one wife too many. Some say monogamy is the same.
   Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive
   by 90 percent.... Wedding cake! Marriage is a 3-ring circus:
   engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering