Quotable Quotes - Sailing

from our clubs site:

This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a U.S. naval ship with the Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland, October 1995.

Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT
YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: We're a lighthouse. Your call.

When its windy......

Its blowing dogs of chains..... or its blowing the numbers of the sails.

Rides like this set boats and sailors appart...... often tearing them appart.

My old Tae Kwon Do instructor's favorite line was "It's only pain......  It doesnt hurt".  Did not make sense to me but I was not about to argue.

(stolen from another sailing site!)

While running a charter boat in St Thomas USVI.

1. Guest asked "how do these islands stay here"? To which I replied, "well mam
they (the islands) have two big anchors, one at either end. Thats the
reason airfares are cheaper in the summer, because of the warmer weather,
we are able to move the islands North".

2. Another question asked. "Do you and your crew live here"? "No mam we fly in
from the mainland every morning".

3. Upon looking over a harbor full of anchored boats,a guest asked:

"Is it proper nautical etiquette for everyone to have their boat facing the
same way while parked in harbor?"

The answer: "The owners get fined if their boats don't face the same
direction".

4. A very large lady and her husband where on a day charter boat with about
fifty other guests. Her husband decided to go snorkelling, just before he
left the boat, his wife handed him two empty plastic water bottles and
asked. "Bob, get me some of that light blue water over there and some of
the darker blue water over there"!