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Brian View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Brian Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 Mar 05 at 8:54am

my mum (to me): put on a jumper u look freezing

me: im so hot im in a torpor

my dad: whats that, some kind of a small sailboat?

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lemeouttahere View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote lemeouttahere Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Apr 05 at 8:44pm

from our clubs site:

This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a U.S. naval ship with the Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland, October 1995.

Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT
YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: We're a lighthouse. Your call.

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Scooby_simon View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Scooby_simon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Apr 05 at 9:29pm
Old......But good
F16 GBR 553 - Hungry Monster - For sale
Wanna learn to Ski - PM me..
I also talk sport here
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stuarthop View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote stuarthop Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Apr 05 at 10:06pm
lol

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hydrographer20 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote hydrographer20 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Apr 05 at 10:33pm
ahh thats a classic
byte me!- GBR 814
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Calum_Reid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Apr 05 at 9:17pm
Thats excelent
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49erGBR735HSC View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote 49erGBR735HSC Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Apr 05 at 3:27pm
Bet you the Americans still kept on going
Dennis Watson 49er GBR735
Helensburgh S.C
Boat Insurance from Noble Marine

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Post Options Post Options   Quote Graham Iles Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Apr 05 at 12:50pm
Bowman to Skipper at Cowes week: Just tell me when you're going to gybe and I'll put it in my diary. Next Thursday is good for me.
Happines is a deep depression
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Post Options Post Options   Quote lemeouttahere Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Apr 05 at 12:53pm

no really a quot but a laugh,

Getting ready for the new season?
Need a training guide?

Try this?

PRESEASON REFRESHER COURSE:

To best prepare yourself for the sailing season try these quick exercises:
1. Buy a case of beer, sit with it in a very warm place for a few hours,
then drink it.
2. Apply sunscreen to your face in streaks and sit in front of a sun lamp
for 2 hours.
3. Sit on a bench with large metal fixtures cutting into your legs, stare
straight up into the sun for two hours - for a more robust workout: invite 
friends to come over and yell at you the whole time.         & nbsp;         & nbsp;         & nbsp;         & nbsp;  4. Go out and get
very drunk, sleep 4 hours, then stand on a rocking chair for 6 hours.
5. Go to bank and withdraw $1,000 - then light it on fire.
6. Sit in front of a commercial fan and have someone throw large buckets of
salt water on you.
7. Repeat number 6 in jeans and a sweatshirt and /or repeat number 6 with
head turned sideways to ensure water lodging fully into ear drum.
8. Cut limb off nearby tree, tie ropes to it, stand on rocking chair with
tree limb and ropes - hold them over your head for 3 hours... at 5 minute
intervals drop on your head - more robust version: have friends yell at you
in 6 minute intervals.
9. Set your wrist watch to 5-minute repeating counts ... let it go off all
day long.
10. Pour cold water in your lap and give yourself a wedgie, now alternate
between sitting and running around bent over.
11. Tie ropes between 2 trees - push your body against them as hard as you
can for 6 consecutive hours - don't stop for pain or bruising.
12. Place sandpaper on your stairs, crawl up and down on your knees for
several hours.
13. Make 12 sandwiches on white bread with bad meat and cram them into a
bread bag - eat one a day for 12 consecutive days... make sure the last one
is peanut butter and jelly if preparing for Race Week.
14. Tie ropes to rear bumper of friend's car, hold on tightly, but allow
rope to slip through fingers as car drives away - TIP: works best with
nylon fiber ropes, lengths in excess of 50'.
15. Upon completion of previous 14 drills - sit down and drink 14 Mt Gay
rum drinks, any flavor.

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Post Options Post Options   Quote lemeouttahere Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Apr 05 at 1:06pm




Amidships - condition of being surrounded by boats. 

Anchor - a device designed to bring up mud samples from the bottom at inopportune or  unexpected times. 

Anchor Light - a small light used to discharge the battery before daylight. 

Berth - a little addition to the crew. 

Boom - sometimes the result of a surprise jibe. 

Bottom Paint - what you get when the cockpit seats are freshly painted. 

Chart - a type of map which tells you exactly where you are aground. 

Clew - an indication from the skipper as to what he might do next. 

Companionway - a double berth. 

Dead Reckoning - a course leading directly to a reef. 

Deadrise - getting up to check the anchor at 0300. 

Deviation - any departure from the Captainís orders. 

Dinghy - the sound of the shipís bell. 

Displacement - when you dock your boat and canít find it later. 

Estimated Position - a place you have marked on the chart where you are sure you are not. 

First Mate - crew member necessary for skippers to practice shouting instructions to. 

Foul Wind - breeze produced by flying turkey.

Freeboard - food and liquor supplied by the owner. 

Headway - what you are making if you canít get the toilet to work. 

Heave-Ho - what you do when youíve eaten too much Ho. 

Jibe - either you like it or you donít and it gets you. 

Keel - term used by 1st mate after too much heel by skipper. 

Landlubber - anyone on board who wishes he were not. 

Latitude - the number of degrees off course allowed a guest. 

Mast - religious ritual used before setting sail.

Mizzen - an object you canít find. 

Ram - an intricate docking maneuver sometimes used by experienced skippers. 

Rhumb Line - two or more crew members waiting for a drink. 

Sheet - cool, damp, salty night covering.

Shroud - equipment used in connection with a wake. 

Starboard - special board used by skippers for navigation(usually with "Port" on the opposite  side.) 

Swell - a wave thatís just great.  

Square Rigger - a rigger over 30. 

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