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It Pays to Listen ....... |
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Phat Bouy
Posting king Joined: 15 Jun 05 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 168 |
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Topic: It Pays to Listen ....... Posted: 14 Jan 06 at 6:10pm |
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgery. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his Stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away most likely bird flu." The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead," he replied." How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something." The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. 300 pounds!" she cried. "300 pounds just to tell me my duck is dead?!!" The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been 50 pounds, but what with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up.!!!!! |
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Je suis Marxiste - tendance Groucho
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Isis
Really should get out more Joined: 01 Sep 05 Online Status: Offline Posts: 2753 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 14 Jan 06 at 6:26pm |
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bigwavedave
Really should get out more Joined: 04 Jun 04 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 944 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 14 Jan 06 at 6:53pm |
No offence intended BNS. 4 people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman. |
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les5269
Really should get out more Joined: 11 Oct 05 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 1530 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 14 Jan 06 at 6:58pm |
Definately no offense BnS Edited by les5269 |
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49er 531 & 5000 5025 and a mirror(now gone to mirror heaven)!
Grafham water Sailing Club The greatest inland sailing in the country |
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Isis
Really should get out more Joined: 01 Sep 05 Online Status: Offline Posts: 2753 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 14 Jan 06 at 7:40pm |
LMFAO!!
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Black no sugar
Really should get out more Joined: 04 Dec 04 Location: Somewhere between Brighton and Lancing Online Status: Offline Posts: 3941 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 15 Jan 06 at 1:02am |
I don't take offense, guys, because we've got the same joke in France, where the Englishman gets the slap! No love lost there... Now, this is especially for Scoob, our notorious petrol-head. This might be an improvement to your 4-wheeled darling: http://uk.rd.yahoo.com/oa/*http://uk.download.yahoo.com/pr/f u/oa/future.wmv I want one! |
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les5269
Really should get out more Joined: 11 Oct 05 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 1530 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 15 Jan 06 at 8:07am |
Glad to see we all think the same in europe Do you think they'll make a boat like that |
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49er 531 & 5000 5025 and a mirror(now gone to mirror heaven)!
Grafham water Sailing Club The greatest inland sailing in the country |
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bigwavedave
Really should get out more Joined: 04 Jun 04 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 944 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 15 Jan 06 at 9:35am |
! Edited by bigwavedave |
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Black no sugar
Really should get out more Joined: 04 Dec 04 Location: Somewhere between Brighton and Lancing Online Status: Offline Posts: 3941 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 15 Jan 06 at 10:11am |
Thank you Edited by Black no sugar |
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bigwavedave
Really should get out more Joined: 04 Jun 04 Location: United Kingdom Online Status: Offline Posts: 944 |
Post Options Quote Reply Posted: 15 Jan 06 at 11:04am |
. Edited by bigwavedave |
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