here goes,
International Drinking Rules
You must use your left hand for all drinking; failure to do so results in a penalty.- often the hand usage is dictated to by time i.e left hand drinking for the first half of the hour, right hand drinking for the second half
Drinking is not drinking but consuming, while a downage may also be called imbiding.
A drink must be called a beverage.
A glass is not a glass, but a vessel.
Permission must be asked from the chairman to leave the table. (Not always carried out as it can be very annoying.)
A hand is an appendage.
Fingers must be called digits.
Pointing at anything is forbidden. Instead use your elbow to indicate.
Use of surnames is sometimes added so that you may only call people by Mr.or Miss. Bloggs. Not Jo or Sue.
In the more than likely event of a spillage the spiller has to don the necessary protection encase it happens again. Unfortunately, or rather fortunately, dry suits and wetsuits don't get looked upon with much respect in restaurants so these are replaced with other rubber wear......the pink marigolds! These are then worn until someone else spills either food or drink when they are passed on to the deserving recipient.
If any of the above rules are broken then a well-deserved penalty is required. This is normally a volume to consume decided by either the Chairman or Weights and Measures.
During the night several positions are also created for other games and activities. In Brief these are:
Chairman Main person in charge. Any decisions go through the chairman.
Weights and Measures Person in charge of deciding upon penalties and ensuring that vessels are full.
Chief Sneak Sneaks rule breakers to the Chairman for sentencing.
Renegade Master When the Renegade Master stands up and says "Dance once again like the renegade master" and stands in a cheesy dance pose you must form your own cheesy position as soon as possible. The last person, as judged by the Renegade Master, to freeze is then given a penalty and takes over the role of Renegade Master.
Thumb Master When the Thumb Master puts their left thumb on the table you must also put yours on the table. The last person to do so is provided with a penalty and then becomes Thumb Master.
Dynamite Master When the dynamite master pretends to “take cover” on the floor you must also put “take cover” on the floor. The last person to do so is provided with a penalty and then becomes Dynamite Master. This rule is not enforced if the Dynamite Master is suffering from acute alcohol poisoning (as judged by the Chairman)
Mr/Mrs Obvious Does something obvious, the last person to do it drinks a penalty and becomes Mr/Mrs Obvious.
Mr/Mrs Unobvious Does something unobvious, the last person to do it drinks a penalty and becomes Mr/Mrs unobvious.
Tommy Two Pence When a two pence piece is dropped into your beverage you must consume it all to prevent Tommy of Freddie from drowning. You then have Tommy or Freddie to pass on as you see fit. The only time when you do not need to consume is when you have not had any of your beverage. This is called a virgin beverage and so must be consumed by the provider of the coin and then they must promptly re-supply their intended victim with a new beverage.
Tommy may also take other forms such as Freddy Five pence or Percy one pence.
Games
Bunnies This can be as simple or as complicated as you like because more and more rules can be added when you become more competent. The aim of the game is to catch people out by making them do the wrong thing or by catching them unawares so that they do not do anything when they are supposed to.
To play this game it is probably best to sit in a circle so that you can see who is next to each other. The person who starts the game holds both hands to their head with the thumbs touching the head and the fingers pointing to the ceiling. The players either side of this person must also put the hand nearest to him/her up to their own head so that in total four hands are against someone's head. The player in control, who has both hands up, may then pass the bunny to someone else by several methods. The most simple is to simply drop one of his hands. If he drops his left hand the player on his right must then make sure that both hands are to their head and that the player to his right has their left hand suitably in position. The bunny may also be passed across the table by removing both hands from your head and pointing them both at the person you want to become bunny. Play then resumes around this person. When receiving a bunny in this method you need to be careful that it is not a Dummy Bunny. This looks similar to the pass BUT the thumbs never leave the bunny's head, so they remain bunny.
The rules so far are enough to start a game but other rules may be added for more interest. The next step may be adding a mirror to when someone passes the bunny to you by "pointing". This is simply done by putting your arms out crossed across you chest. The bunny then remains with the original person.
So far to pass the bunny to your left you may point or remove a hand from the right hand side of your head. An alternative, which may can only pass it to either side while jumping the person immediately next to you, is to put bother fingers onto your nose. This is the sign that you are passing it to the direction that you are pointing but wish to miss your neighbour out. To pass it to the left you must use your right hand on the right hand side of your nose and vice versa.
You may also add a crossed pass which is performed by passing the bunny with your arms crossed. This means that you must put your left hand on the right hand side of your head and vice versa whilst remembering to keep the side of your head closest to the bunny with a hand on. (So if the bunny is to your right you put your left hand on the right hand side of your head.) The crossed bunny is uncrossed by passing the bunny straight again.
I have never....... This is a game best played with people you know so that you can stitch people up, plus it also helps if you know if they are telling the truth. Basically the game is simple. You go around the table and everyone says something that they have not done, for example "I have never been to Lands End." If you have done this then you consume the decided upon penalty whilst standing up. Obviously this game can be a very successful tool in embarrassing people and finding out new information. "I have nevers" examples may be found by here if you feel like getting some of us.
Knob, Plonker, Bollocks Basically the same as 21 but instead you replace the numbers 1,2,3.... with the roman numeral equivalent using: knob = I plonker = V bollocks = X
So to start you off it goes: knob knob knob knob knob knob knob plonker plonker plonker knob plonker knob knob knob bollocks.........
When you reach the equivalent of 21 the person who should have said it consumes and the game restarts without the renaming that is found in 21.
------------- FLAT IS FAST!
Shifts Happen
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